1. |
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We're not the same band that we used to be,
Let us present the brand new Ding Dong Probably,
Myself and Darren King and Richard Hill makes three,
Our hearts now on our sleeve for everyone to see.
We know it's time to grow up,
Or when we play no one will show up,
To follow trends, that is the key.
We give it all and then some,
On this our brand new album,
welcome to Dingdology.
Dingdology
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2. |
The Japanese Blur
00:10
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|
I want to see the dicks,
I want to see the bits,
I want to see them smash each other in a sexual manner.
Abolish the Japanese blur,
Abolish the Japanese blur.
|
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3. |
Tuppence Addict
01:04
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|
Of course you think you know him
But soon he'll do you over
He knows nothing of friendship
He's got no fucking morals
He's got one thing on his mind
The man's a world class liar
He sees you as an object
He is a tuppence addict
He will fuck anything (go)
He has got an itchy chin (aye Gobe)
He bathes in sin, he bathes in quim (go)
He lives for tuppence, it's his thing.
Of course you think you know him
But he has many layers
He comes across as charming
But he has no emotions
He's got one thing on his mind
To feel you from the inside
His thoughts are far from pure
you'll think maybe he loves you
He will fuck anything (go)
He has got an itchy chin (aye Gobe)
He bathes in sin, he bathes in quim
He lives for tuppence, it's his thing.
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4. |
The Pickwick Papers
00:35
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|
Hang a bang now,
I can't see this working out for anyone but you.
But that's the way it goes,
That's the way that you roll.
Pure convenience,
Not even your friends will back you.
'Cause I was always gonna let you down.
'Cause you know I fucking love letting you down.
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5. |
Cowabungle
01:21
|
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|
Oh what a lovely day, let's all go to the beach
Grab our surf boards, and head to the water
Drive for miles and miles, definitely worth it
Put your wet-suit on, it is very cold please.
Lie down on your board, paddle with your hands
To get out to the back, 'cause that is where the waves live
You sit and wait, and wait and wait.
Freezing fucking cold so you piss in your wet-suit
Oh who would have thought it, a wave is developing
You're already in the sea, you may as well catch it
You say oh look at me, I'm hanging ten MAN
You're very pleased with yourself, so you shout Cowabungle.
Something is protruding from the water
It's sleek and slender and thin
No it couldn't be, we're in Swansea
It's a bloody fin
Oh fucking hell, it's Jaws from Jaws
He's snapping at your heel, so panic like a seal.
You're out of your element, he's going to gape you
When you're in the sea, you're in the shark's house.
Oh what a lovely day, let's all go to the beach
Grab our surf boards, and head to the water
Drive for miles and miles, definitely worth it
No-one is cooler than you.
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6. |
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I try, I try, I try...
Every time I take a mission down there,
I'm always so scared,
Cause everything's always full price.
Where the fuck are all these fucking bargains?
It never happens.
Time after time after after time.
Take a look at fucking Joey Daniels,
His Birkenstock Sandals,
Fucking half price, fucking sly.
All I want's a fucking denim jacket,
To sew on some patches,
But I'm just a super skint guy.
I try, I try, I try
I'm so unsuccessful.
I try, I try, I try
I just can't catch a break.
I just wanna score some super cheap clothes like you.
I try, I try, I try...
I try, I try, I try
I'm so unsuccessful.
I try, that's right, I try
But I can't catch a break and,
I try, but I,
guess I don't know how to MacArthur Glen.
All I want's a fucking denim jacket.
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7. |
My Best Friend
01:33
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He's my friend, and I like him very much.
He cost me a lot, but I think he's really nice.
He sleeps on my bed, and he likes to sleep a lot.
He does what he wants, he doesn't know when to stop.
Day after day, I find my love grows for you
And everyday I stop, and think I'd be lost without you.
Promise you'll stay and if you get the chance, you'll never run away.
My house is not a home without you.
He's my friend, but he's never cleaned up once.
He shits on the floor, and I have to pick it up.
Seven he wakes up, and of course he fucking wakes me up.
He does what he wants, he just doesn't give a fuck.
Day after day, I find my love grows for you
And everyday I stop, and think I'd be lost without you.
Promise you'll stay and if you get the chance, you'll never run away.
My house is not a home without you.
He's my friend
(A little prince if anything)
He's my friend
(A little prince if anything)
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8. |
Bug Chasers Welcome
00:39
|
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|
Bug Chaser, don't fucking do it.
Once you have contracted it, you never will get rid of it.
Gift Giver, are you fucking stupid?
I've had some shit gifts in my time, but yours is the worst.
Let's get pozzed up, everybody pozz up
Give me the gift so I don't have to worry anymore.
Charge up, everybody charge up
It’s a fatal disease for which there is no cure.
If you haven’t heard about Bug Chasing
Type it in to google it will melt your brain
As Johnnie Cochran said, that does not make sense
If you’re intent on chasing bugs then I suggest Pokemon
Let's get pozzed up, everybody pozz up
Give me the gift so I don't have to worry anymore.
Charge up, everybody charge up
It’s a fatal disease for which there is no cure.
AIDS
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9. |
Pizzas?
00:10
|
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Are you even a pop punk band if you haven't got pizzas on your merch?
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10. |
Fact Find
00:54
|
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We gonna do a fact find
We gonna find out the facts
Me and Ding Dong Probably
gonna find out the facts
x 2
We gonna make enquiries ask all around,
Grab pen and paper write everything down.
Get on the phone, dial up the number
Do an internet search to find a new drummer.
Fact One - We made three albums in one year.
Fact Two - We haven’t done a single gig yet.
Phil The Lip, And The Rew
That’s a shout out to the Bonyud Qrew.
We gonna do a fact find
We gonna find out the facts
Me and Ding Dong Probably
gonna find out the facts
x2
Fact Three - Fucking ripping fucking quanged
Fact Four - 'Cause we’re South Wales only hardcore band
So if you love Ding Dong say wayo
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11. |
The Big [redacted]
00:49
|
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|
[redacted]
There's blaw on the blaw
[redacted]
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12. |
You Can Call Me Gil
00:23
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13. |
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If there's one thing, that I want less
Than a second hand syringe.
It's a second hand cock mag.
If there's one thing, that I want less
Than a second hand flesh light
It's a second hand cock mag.
Way back, in Swansea Town
There was this man who would sell them for just a pound,
We were always well underage so we'd just look from a distance,
Confused and well slightly aroused.
When I finally realised,
That the pictures were viewed through a pervert's eyes,
It made me think of the hygiene implied,
I felt physically sick and my cock it just died.
If there's one thing that I want less
Than a second hand cock mag,
It's a second rate hardcore band.
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14. |
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This is the theme tune, to Ripper Radio
Rock Music podcast, on the internet
The Necromancer, will romance your neck
he loved our album, Up in Heaven Down in Heck
Necro, Mancer - He's on ripper radio
Necro, Mancer - He will romance your neck
Necro, Mancer - He's on ripper radio
Necro, Mancer - He will romance all our necks
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15. |
Potato Man
02:04
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He's the Potato Man,
Got pinned to the floor by my old man.
He peels potatoes as fast as he can,
But he's far too slow for my old man.
He's just a tiny man,
A minute man with smaller hands.
He peels potatoes, it swells his glans,
But he's far too weak for my old man.
But he had to try and spoil it, the human toilet.
He fucking loves potatoes, the fucking brown nose.
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16. |
Stranger Things
02:03
|
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Stranger Things, Stranger Things
Netflix Original, Stranger Things. x2
A little while back, right out of the blue
Netflix got in touch, to see what we could do.
To write them a theme song, for their new show
It's set in the Eighties, that's all we had to know.
They asked for a quote, so we gave them a quote
And they couldn't afford it,
But we'd already wrote the theme to...
Stranger Things, Stranger Things
Suitably Eighties, Stranger Things. x2
Winona Ryder, talking to lights on the wall.
Steve Harrington, he's got a bat but no ball.
Dustin Henderson, got a trucker cap but no teeth.
Hiding after school, feeding Dart cold cut meat.
But you'd better think twice,
Before you fuck with Jim Hopper,
Deep down inside he's nice,
Because he's buying shares in Eggos.
Roll the twenty side dice,
Because we're going to the upside down.
Hey you guys, forget about ten
DK's gonna take it to eleven
Stranger Things, Stranger Things
Beware The Demogorgon, Stranger Things.
Stranger Things, Stranger Things.
Justice for Barbara, Stranger Things.
Stranger Things, Stranger Things.
Rocking to The Clash and watching, Stranger Things.
Stranger Things, Stranger Things.
The original theme tune for, Stranger Things.
Stranger Things
Ace of Spades
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17. |
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I was out front for service,
When in walked an old acquaintance.
It wasn't someone I liked much,
I thought I'd do what everybody else does.
Handed out a burger,
I was being watched by the manager.
Seventeen and a nervous breakdown,
All for a two pound takedown.
I'd like to say I never go back,
but I've been there today.
Then as I was leaving,
My non-developed brain fucking realised
Now I'm unemployable, I can't even keep a job in fast food.
Fuck sake my life is over,
I went to Keith's to watch Futurama.
Seventeen and a nervous breakdown,
All for a Big Mac takedown.
I'd like to say I think it's gay, but I ate there x2
I'd like to say I think it's gay but I ate there today
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18. |
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Yes, Michelle -
You know I've fucking read between the lines, Michelle -
In every fucking job I've ever
had, Michelle -
You gotta fucking give me them boots.
No, Michelle -
Those flip flops they are looking pretty
sweet, Michelle -
Let's hope you don't have to get on your
feet, Michelle -
You'll fuck them in the warehouse if you do.
You know I'll wear the boots.
I'll happily wear those boots.
But, you gotta give them to me, Michelle.
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19. |
The Formulon
01:04
|
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Just breathe,
I'm singing from the front of my throat,
Somehow,
I never wrote the formula down,
Because,
There's no debate on how it fucking ends.
I value all my family and friends.
In a genre where you postcode dictates your relevance why would you choose to be irrelevant?
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20. |
Jeffrey & The Dark Web
01:19
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Jeffrey and the dark web x2
I know a man named Jeffrey
And he's got cabin fever
He lives in the woods
He likes to put a donk upon it.
And when he isn't working
He partakes in a bit of surfing
But he's never seen the water
He's a dark web lurker.
What's this man get up to?
When there's no one watching?
Why's he on the down low?
What is Jeffrey hiding?
I know a man named Jeffrey
And I can't say I blame him
I would be more mental
If I lived in seclusion.
And when he isn't working
He likes to eat some mushrooms
And buzz his fucking nut off
He's a bloody mental.
What's this man get up to?
When there's no one watching?
Why's he on the down low?
What is Jeffrey hiding? x2
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21. |
||||
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Are They Holograms Or Are They Spectres?
|
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22. |
Fucken Love
01:16
|
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WHOOOOOOOOOAAAAA x4
We fucken love a hey and
We fucken love a yeah and
We fucken love some good 'ol OI OI OI OI's
But what we love the most,
Even more than beans on toast,
Is some proper fucken catchy
Emphasising backbeat
Whoa,
It's proper fucking hardcore.
Whoa,
You know we fucken love a fucken,
Whoa,
It's proper fucking hardcore.
Whoa.
These Poundland Slayer knock offs,
They don't buy my lunch.
And they've forgotten how to whoa.
And yet they'll proudly wear their Misfits tops on stage,
I'm gonna say...
No,
To all your shitty fucking hardcore.
No,
All you fucken do is fucken,
Pose,
Playing your shitty fucking hardcore.
Whoa.
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23. |
Qrayon Qrew
00:45
|
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|
I used to play with crayons now I have to cook and clean,
Have to cook and clean,
Have to cook and clean.
I used to play my bass til I invented Halloween,
And all my friends are dead.
I used to play with crayons now I have a Parker pen,
have a Parker pen,
a lovely fountain pen.
I used to play with Barbie, but now I only play with Ken,
And all my friends are men.
I used to eat narcotics now I eat some chocolate cake,
Eat some chocolate cake,
Delicious chocolate cake,
I drink so much coffee that I’m fucking wide awake,
And all my friends are friends
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24. |
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There I was in Amsterdam, having lots of good clean fun.
Hanging in the red light district, hanging out in booths of cum.
I drank all day and drank all night, i had a puff and went all white.
Got in a taxi to take me home, that's when my guts they did explode.
Kieran Daniels, Ten Euro Fart x4
The Taximun he weren't impressed, that's unnatural he said distressed.
He failed to see the funny side, to be fair something crawled up and died.
You swear he'd never lost control, my bowel gas had left him cold.
I'm on holidays mate I'm having it large, that's when he applied the extra charge.
Kieran Daniels, Ten Euro Fart x4
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25. |
Dingdologist Criterion
00:55
|
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Listen up everybody, because we have compiled a list.
Of qualities and attributes (and tasks)
to be a Dingdologist
One – Devour a buffet of cum
Two – Build a Shit Monster when you plop
Three – Drink a heart palpitation coffee
Four – Be proper hardcore
Five – Accept that you're going to be dust
Six – Sit down when you piss
Seven – Down in heck, up in heaven
Eight – The world is full of cunts mate
Nine – Profits are Babylon
Ten – Do all your writing with a quill not a pen
If you don't fulfill the criteria,
It means that you are inferior,
and you do not have, what it takes to be a Dingdologist.
|
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26. |
More Hardcore Is Needed
02:03
|
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|
Party Thrash?
You've never listened to Anthrax in your fucking life.
It's just the same old shit hardcore bands giving themselves the licence to rip off Every Time I Die, a little bit more than they were anyway.
We've all heard The Big Dirty, fellas.
It came out ten fucking years ago, pull your fucking pants up.
I know it's not your fault, 'cause you were never shown.
Caught up in the crossfire, MySpace rolled it's own.
You never knew the difference, cause you were never shown (we were never shown) You were never told...
More hardcore is needed in this town,
More hardcore is needed in this town,
Scrounging riffs - look in the lost and found,
More hardcore in needed in this town.
Facebook page?
You haven't even had a fucking band practise yet.
You got fucking cool promo shots on the top of your shopping list. Where are the fucking riffs? You're just chatting in the fucking pub.
Give me content, give me songs, give me music, you're supposed to be a fucking band.
That's why no one ever does fuck all and no one ever gives a fuck about you and your shit bands
I know it's not your fault, 'cause you were never shown.
Caught up in the crossfire, MySpace rolled it's own.
You never knew the difference, cause you were never shown (we were never shown). You were never told...
More hardcore is needed in this town,
More hardcore is needed in this town,
Listen now, I know you're fucking proud,
More hardcore in needed in this town.
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27. |
||||
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I used to work for Huzzbuck bank
Sat with a telephone on my head
One day a naughty boy called me
He intended to behave fraudulently
I didn't do my job properly
He went on a big spending spree
27,000 pounds? (header)
I subsequently lost my job
True story
|
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28. |
||||
|
Don't, put me in a box.
You don't, know anything about me. x2
Why don't you walk, a mile in my shoes.
And then you will see, it's easy to be you.
And you've got so much to lose.
Don't, put me in a box.
You don't, know anything about me.
You sit high on your pedestal, judging everyone else.
But watch you don't fall...down.
The higher you are, the harder you'll fall,
I want to be there to witness it all. x2
Don't put me in a box x3
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29. |
Fast Tracked To Zion
01:46
|
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|
Ding Dong, Mo fire
Diddely Ding Dong Probably
We rock in a de place
We don't just play the hardcore
We play the drum & bass
Exploding in your ears on a musical spree
Producing many albums for our audience of three
We used to blaze the chronic but we don't no more,
If we shared a spliff right now it would put us on the floor
Skewen Cimla and Bryncoch
That is where we come from
Skiddelybiddely skiddelybiddely diddely diddely dong
Ding Dong Probably,
We are fast tracked to Zion
No fire to fry on, we’ll be chilling in Zion
Diddely Ding Dong Probably,
Got reservations in Zion.
We don’t need no shoulder to cry on
On Holy Mount Zion
Fast tracked to Zion
Ding Dong Probably
South Wales only hardcore band
We are a band of three
Fast tracked to Zion when they put us in a hearse
Because we love His Majesty Selassie The First
Ding Dong Probably,
We are fast tracked to Zion
No fire to fry on, we’ll be chilling in Zion
Diddely Ding Dong Probably,
Got reservations in Zion.
We don’t need no shoulder to cry on
On Holy Mount Zion
We are fast tracked to Zion x 3
Ding Dong Probably, we are fast tracked to Zion
|
||||
30. |
Neath Voice For Everyone
02:51
|
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|
Townsfolk Babbling
Now if you're looking for irrational,
In no way fucking racist.
Heated debates about our town,
You'll be glad at what we've found.
It's like a civilised, municipal,
Online public forum.
For calling out all the tramps on spice.
It's Neath Voice For Everyone.
Book a psychic.
Get your face put on a cake.
A new fridge freezer.
Now if you're looking to publicise,
Your new business venture.
Maybe you've opened a tattoo shop?
There's only twenty-seven others in town.
Now if you're looking to have a pop,
At Neath Port Talbot Council.
We already wrote a song about the lights.
No one understood the joke.
Now if you think that your opinion,
Matters to anyone in the world.
It's Neath Voice For Everyone.
|
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31. |
||||
|
You know we are the same band we've always been,
The record of the year it's Dingdology.
Myself and Darren King and Richard Hill agree,
That you do not deserve us, our records should not be free.
We had our chance to grow up,
Don't give a fuck if no one shows up.
We're the band we were born to be,
And after all we are South Wales only hardcore band.
(South Wales only hardcore band)
Ding Dong Probably.
|
||||
Ding Dong Probably Neath, UK
South Wales Only Hardcore Band
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